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Post by Lord Charm on Jul 19, 2020 15:53:04 GMT
Hello, community! Prepare yourselves for a long story So, I came here looking for some advice in order to improve my lifestyle. To begin with, I messaged Heywood Jablowme with a "situation" I have and he gave me some interesting advice which I decided to share with you as to benefit from it. The story: So, there is this girl, HB8,5-9. I went on a couple of "dates" with her. I mean, before the pandemic I went with her 3 times at a restaurant and twice just in parks with two of her best friends(a girl and that girl's BF). We were having fun and she showed some IOIs (laughing at all my jokes, slightly touching my arm, leaning towards me when making a joke or at least that is what I consider IOIs). But I didn't know what to do, because she had a boyfriend. During the pandemic we have chatted a little bit, but I have felt some coldness. Now comes the interesting part. I have met her outside when we were able to go out. I have talked a little bit with her. A week later we were both at a party where I found out that she broke up with her boyfriend a few days before. Her best friend (out of nowhere) told me to shoot my shot, but I thought she was joking ...I talked to the HB8,5-9 a little bit but left her and went on having some talks with other friends. At a certain moment (pretty soon) she and her best friend(girl) left the party. I asked her why is she leaving so soon and she said: "Because you didn't invite me to dance". The next day I saw her with somebody else at a restaurant. She was either invited that day or earlier, I don't know. The thing is I do not know what to do. Either send her a text and inviting her out or just forget about it. It might be silly, I am pretty new in this game. I usually feel great during conversations with girls and I manage to create connection. Pretty tough with the opening and the ending, but I have tried a random approach on the street and got some IG accounts First of all, every author of a story which begins with "There is this one girl" should definitely read mpuaforum.proboards.com/thread/189/girl, as Heywood advised me. One important question was "Should I try to date her if she has a BF?" Here is an interesting piece of advice which I find really useful: "Stop giving a shit if that went well or not. You can't control it anyway. He's just one of her many options. Your objective is to be the better option. Again, not your concern. If you flirt with her and it takes you in a positive direction, you're good. Because she's attracted to you. The number one law of attraction is that you cannot help WHO you're attractive to. Your solid main goal is twofold. Isolate/escalate. " Credits to Heywood. He really helped me to overcome this silly question I had.
If any of you guys is in the same situation as I am, try this "It's time to increase the level of flirting. You want to turn up the heat to a sexual vibe." I was also guided to use this line "I had an erotic dream last night and guess who was in it? I’ll give you a hint. I’m texting her right now." which I personally find interesting and useful. (Thought it would help you) Another useful tip was not to make it seem like you want a 'date' when texting this girl I was talking about. And I was really concerned with whether the HB had a BF or not, if she says: "I have a boyfriend" after you invite her somewhere, this is also an interesting line from Heywood: "Don't bring him, he'll just get jealous of all the attention you give me." And that's it. Hope it is helpful. Any further advice and suggestions are welcomed. I will add updates on how the "situation" escalated.
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Post by JackZero on Jul 19, 2020 17:16:50 GMT
You took her to a restaurant 3 times and had two walks in the park. Did anything happen on those dates other than maybe an obligatory kiss goodbye(if that)? I ask that because she complained that you didn't dance with her. I'm wondering why she would look at you as a sexual option if you're acting like you don't view her as one?
I'm not too much of a fan of a guy that builds a foundation of who he is with a girl and then when he starts losing her, he wants to change that image. If you guys didn't have any sexual tension on any of the times you've seen her...you are digging yourself out of a deep hole. This is especially true if she left the party and pointed out you didn't ask her to dance and her best friend told you to take your shot before that.
So are you in the position of having to dig yourself out of a hole is the question you should be asking yourself before you move forward? If you are in a hole, you can't all of a sudden try to sell yourself as one.
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Post by N2thevoid on Jul 19, 2020 17:59:45 GMT
The most powerful thing a woman can experience (well maybe with exception to giving birth) is to feel desired.
You not joining her on the dance floor was essentially her wanting you to show your desire for her.
If you continue to fail in responding to these (often subtle) cues, someone else will.
Someone like say Lounge Lizard Heywood, in his loud Hawaiian flamingo patterned button up, top 4 buttons down, shaking and shimmying with his cocky semi-creepy 'come to me' grin whilst carelessly holding his mai tai as he approaches her, crotch first, on the dance floor.
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Post by Lord Charm on Jul 19, 2020 20:59:39 GMT
It is not that I just wanted to play with her. I wanted a relationship, but I knew she had a BF. And back then, I knew nothing about PUAs. There is this incapability of me to take things (in this area) to the end. I remember Neil Strauss said sth about this in the book, too. There was some tension as we hugged and slightly touched. But as I said, she had a BF. Also, when her friend told me to take my shot, I thought it was a joke, tbh.
So, to sum it up, I have to get over the problem of "taking things to the end" and the "anxiety" of doing it if there is a BF in the equation.
Thanks for your advice!
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Post by JackZero on Jul 19, 2020 21:48:21 GMT
I'm trying to follow your line of thinking. You went out on dates with this girl. You wanted a relationship with this girl. The only reason you didn't try anything is because of the boyfriend. However, you went out on multiple dates with this girl who had a boyfriend.
Why are you halfassing? You went out on dates and were trying to nice guy her into a relationship with you. If you are going to steal another guys girlfriend, you need to go all of the way. She already has a guy that she can walk in the park, go out to dinner, and double date with. You need to give her what she's missing.
If a girl is dating another guy while in a relationship, she is usually missing something in her current relationship. The thing that she is normally missing is her boyfriend not being able to resist trying to rip off her clothes when they're alone. Boyfriends get comfortable and that's normally their weakness if you want to steal a girl.
Quit trying to pretend to be the nice guy when your goal is to steal another guys girlfriend. If you were the nice guy, you wouldn't be on a date with her.
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Post by Lord Charm on Jul 19, 2020 21:59:59 GMT
I don't know if you are going to believe me or not, but this is the truth. I started dating her, but I thought there she had no interest. In my logic, if she was interested, she should have broke up with her BF, to show me that she is available. As I said, I am new here, trying to figure things out. The fact that we went out together but she still had the BF was blowing my mind. If only I had more experience... and knowledge. I should have tried to escalate, but back then I knew nothing about these things. It was just me, being flirty, without the courage (to say so) to "escalate".
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Post by JackZero on Jul 19, 2020 22:11:34 GMT
I 100% believe you. You have to understand, why would she break up with her boyfriend if you didn't show her that you are a better option? I get you're trying to learn, but I'm telling this so you understand if you are in a situation like this in the future. I keep saying this truth on the forum...a girl with a boyfriend is much easier to seduce than a girl without a boyfriend. A girl without a boyfriend has everything thrown at her, so it is easy for her to pick and choose from all of her options. Girls with boyfriends tend to focus on the things that they are missing. Most of them are missing the feeling of being desired. You want to steal her away, you show her that you desire her.
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Post by Lord Charm on Jul 19, 2020 22:16:13 GMT
I 100% believe you. You have to understand, why would she break up with her boyfriend if you didn't show her that you are a better option? I get you're trying to learn, but I'm telling this so you understand if you are in a situation like this in the future. I keep saying this truth on the forum...a girl with a boyfriend is much easier to seduce than a girl without a boyfriend. A girl without a boyfriend has everything thrown at her, so it is easy for her to pick and choose from all of her options. Girls with boyfriends tend to focus on the things that they are missing. Most of them are missing the feeling of being desired. You want to steal her away, you show her that you desire her. Ok, this is really enlightening. Thanks a lot for the advice and I will definitely take this into account next time.
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Post by Heywood Jablowme on Jul 20, 2020 14:36:41 GMT
I don't know if you are going to believe me or not, but this is the truth. I started dating her, but I thought there she had no interest. In my logic, if she was interested, she should have broke up with her BF, to show me that she is available. As I said, I am new here, trying to figure things out. The fact that we went out together but she still had the BF was blowing my mind. If only I had more experience... and knowledge. I should have tried to escalate, but back then I knew nothing about these things. It was just me, being flirty, without the courage (to say so) to "escalate". The guys are giving you solid advice here. Most girls/women want sex just as much as you do! but they don't just want sex. They want to feel desired first.
The most common reason for a woman to have sex with a casual partner, a.k.a. you Squire, at a total rando bar, party or something, is because she thinks you're hot. If she's paying attention to you, bf or no bf it's because she's attracted to your silly ass.
But for her attraction to go anywhere she needs to feel YOU desire HER. If you do nothing, nothing will happen.
If you make her feel desired [insert sexual tension] she want to reward you by sitting on your dick.
I should do one of those after school segments "The more you know"
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Post by Lord Charm on Jul 20, 2020 14:56:03 GMT
I don't know if you are going to believe me or not, but this is the truth. I started dating her, but I thought there she had no interest. In my logic, if she was interested, she should have broke up with her BF, to show me that she is available. As I said, I am new here, trying to figure things out. The fact that we went out together but she still had the BF was blowing my mind. If only I had more experience... and knowledge. I should have tried to escalate, but back then I knew nothing about these things. It was just me, being flirty, without the courage (to say so) to "escalate". The guys are giving you solid advice here. Most girls/women want sex just as much as you do! but they don't just want sex. They want to feel desired first.
The most common reason for a woman to have sex with a casual partner, a.k.a. you Squire, at a total rando bar, party or something, is because she thinks you're hot. If she's paying attention to you, bf or no bf it's because she's attracted to your silly ass.
But for her attraction to go anywhere she needs to feel YOU desire HER. If you do nothing, nothing will happen.
If you make her feel desired [insert sexual tension] she want to reward you by sitting on your dick.
I should do one of those after school segments "The more you know" -> GREAT IDEA Well, now that I came here I realize I am actually clueless I am impatient now to use this valuable knowledge. There was this popular misconception that we should "play hard to get", "ignore her", "do this, do that". But now that I am reading all this material, I came to realize that it is not entirely true. I am usually not paying attention to that bullshit I mentioned earlier and just be myself around girls (as much as I can), but with this one, things were different as I was a little bit nervous. (TOTAL MISTAKE, I KNOW I AM SILLY). Anyway, I intend to move on and experiment with other HBs. Thanks a lot guys!
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Post by pilgrimmeister on Jul 23, 2020 9:45:07 GMT
Others have covered everything else, but just because she has a BF doesn't mean you can't make moves to show that you are worth dumping him for. Call it insecure or not, many girls will monkey branch and only finish with their current partner when an upgrade is available. Just treat them as if they are single.
She will stop you if there is a problem.
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Post by Heywood Jablowme on Jul 23, 2020 14:47:27 GMT
She will stop you if there is a problem. Every time
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Post by N2thevoid on Jul 23, 2020 15:49:31 GMT
I don't know if you are going to believe me or not, but this is the truth. I started dating her, but I thought there she had no interest. In my logic, if she was interested, she should have broke up with her BF, to show me that she is available. As I said, I am new here, trying to figure things out. The fact that we went out together but she still had the BF was blowing my mind. If only I had more experience... and knowledge. I should have tried to escalate, but back then I knew nothing about these things. It was just me, being flirty, without the courage (to say so) to "escalate". The guys are giving you solid advice here. Most girls/women want sex just as much as you do! but they don't just want sex. They want to feel desired first.The most common reason for a woman to have sex with a casual partner, a.k.a. you Squire, at a total rando bar, party or something, is because she thinks you're hot. If she's paying attention to you, bf or no bf it's because she's attracted to your silly ass. But for her attraction to go anywhere she needs to feel YOU desire HER. If you do nothing, nothing will happen. If you make her feel desired [insert sexual tension] she want to reward you by sitting on your dick. I should do one of those after school segments "The more you know" If there's one thing, and one thing only you take from this board, let it be this.
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Post by N2thevoid on Jul 23, 2020 17:32:57 GMT
The other night I brought this bangin Filipino broad to a nearby beach. It was dark, to her in the middle of nowhere. Some kids smoking weed in the lot and within ear shot of us.
We kissed, held her in close. First facing to me, then turning her away so her ass was pressed firm against my impossible to conceal boner that I let her know she was responsible for.
In spite of all the ppl that have been I held her in close as a fingered her discretely. Her giggles changing to moans and she asks if I’m trying to make a mess...
Be damned sure I made her feel desired first that it was almost without question in my mind she’d partake in the beach festivity that was happening in her little booty shorts. Shortly after we went back to mine and the rest, well use your imagination.
I let her know without any hint of she turned me on. It’s exilerating for girls to know the man she’s attracted to is aroused by her. It only makes the attraction deeper for them - next several nights she’s been bouncing on my cock. You want the woman to feel some lsome influence over you. It keeps the flame going when you stoke her NEED to feel desired.
Never apologize for it. Have fun, blame it on her “your fault for wearing those tiny little short shorts—(spank her ass pull her in). Tease. Take a page out of their book blaming them (playfully).
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Post by Heywood Jablowme on Jul 23, 2020 18:16:36 GMT
Let her know that you aren’t just hot and horny; you are hot and horny for her. She, and She alone is causing you to lust.
Women don't just want to be fucked, they want that too but, they don’t want to think they’re just a notch on your bed post, they want to think they’re special snowflakes to you and the rest of the women are not.
They need to feel safe, and comfortable, and that in the moment they are the only girl that matters. That is what worked so well for N2. On a public beach, he was able to make her feel like they were the only two people that existed on earth.
Inside every woman and girl is a sex animal just waiting to be awakened and let out of her cage. She wants to be wanted, needs to be needed, desires to be desired.
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