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Post by lorenzolopez on Feb 19, 2021 12:57:27 GMT
Hey guys, first post here. Mods if this is the wrong forum please relocate accordingly.
Gentleman, I think one thing we all have in common here is the interest to overcome. I like a challenge and want to woo this former Amish girl - she accidentally contacted me thinking I was a seller of a book and since then we have been messaging on Whatsapp. Funnily enough Ive read the author she was interested in and our convos have revolved around literature and any attempt to discuss anything else has been difficult. I've made her laugh a few times but she is so culturally and socially unaware it's kinda hard. All those years being Amish has had a major influence and it's been a challenge to get her interested in me.
How do i get her to :
-bring her guard down without feeling guilty
-engaged where she enquires
-initiates and shows interest?
Remember this is not some girl I met in a club...
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Post by JackZero on Feb 19, 2021 16:55:15 GMT
Two questions:
1. Why is it difficult to discuss anything outside of literature been difficult?
2. Have you met her in person?
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Post by N2thevoid on Feb 19, 2021 18:43:33 GMT
She sounds like a buzz kill. Why do you find her so enticing?
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Post by lorenzolopez on Feb 19, 2021 21:50:03 GMT
Two questions: 1. Why is it difficult to discuss anything outside of literature been difficult? 2. Have you met her in person? 1- She doesn't respond and one worded at best. We did have a brief convo about work and what she does in her spare time. I followed it up but she didn't respond, she simply said she was busy. 2- Nope. |
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Post by lorenzolopez on Feb 19, 2021 21:50:32 GMT
She sounds like a buzz kill. Why do you find her so enticing? For the challenge! Any advice? |
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Post by N2thevoid on Feb 19, 2021 22:40:21 GMT
She sounds like a buzz kill. Why do you find her so enticing? For the challenge! Any advice? Why |
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Post by JackZero on Feb 19, 2021 23:29:25 GMT
So she one words you on anything outside of books and you haven't met her in person. It's hard to give you advice because you are describing a girl that doesn't seem interested, but instead you are blaming it on her being socially awkward. For shits and giggles, let's say that she is socially awkward. With socially awkward women, it's your responsibility to lead them. If they are interested, they will appreciate you doing that. That means you need to quit wasting time smalltalking her through text and get her to meet up with you or at least take a baby step to getting her to agree to facetiming.
What would make you think, according to your description of your interactions, that she isn't doing anything more than being polite when she one word answers you? Does she reach out to you or is it you that initiates contact?
I ask you all of these questions because I want you to think and be realistic about where you stand with this 1 girl. If you don't know where you actually stand at this moment with her then you can't get the right advice. The fact that you've never met her in person, she hasn't hinted around about meeting in person, and she one words you would make me believe that she is in no way interested in you. I don't know if it's true because you haven't described anything that would make anyone believe that there is potential interest and her being awkward is your excuse for not making things happen.
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Post by N2thevoid on Feb 19, 2021 23:47:04 GMT
She sounds like a buzz kill. Why do you find her so enticing? For the challenge! Any advice? Nope |
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Post by lorenzolopez on Feb 20, 2021 8:00:07 GMT
So she one words you on anything outside of books and you haven't met her in person. It's hard to give you advice because you are describing a girl that doesn't seem interested, but instead you are blaming it on her being socially awkward. For shits and giggles, let's say that she is socially awkward. With socially awkward women, it's your responsibility to lead them. If they are interested, they will appreciate you doing that. That means you need to quit wasting time smalltalking her through text and get her to meet up with you or at least take a baby step to getting her to agree to facetiming. What would make you think, according to your description of your interactions, that she isn't doing anything more than being polite when she one word answers you? Does she reach out to you or is it you that initiates contact? I ask you all of these questions because I want you to think and be realistic about where you stand with this 1 girl. If you don't know where you actually stand at this moment with her then you can't get the right advice. The fact that you've never met her in person, she hasn't hinted around about meeting in person, and she one words you would make me believe that she is in no way interested in you. I don't know if it's true because you haven't described anything that would make anyone believe that there is potential interest and her being awkward is your excuse for not making things happen. Yep theres truth to what youre saying. Re awkward - Im referring to the social cues that any standard woman in society would respond to and Im just assuming that given she has lived most her life in the Amish community she may or may not respond to standard PUA game. Also maybe the portrayal I've given was worse than it actually is - It's weird because when I complimented her cake baking skills she sent me two heart emojis. I jokingly said she needs to bake me a cake and she said to find the book shes looking for. Shes complimented me on my knowledge of literature etc. She laughs during the voice recordings and there has been banter. Where were discussing literature and careers she interacts, there are laughs, she has asked me a few questions etc. Now when I say one worded responses she said she is busy at a family gathering. I think I have piqued her interest but need that to develop and I guess thats where im struggling. |
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Post by N2thevoid on Feb 20, 2021 8:27:17 GMT
Clearly she's not interested, and you can't make someone interested if they'd already decided on you. She's simply being polite as she was raised to be.
Waste of time.
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Post by JackZero on Feb 20, 2021 18:47:51 GMT
So she one words you on anything outside of books and you haven't met her in person. It's hard to give you advice because you are describing a girl that doesn't seem interested, but instead you are blaming it on her being socially awkward. For shits and giggles, let's say that she is socially awkward. With socially awkward women, it's your responsibility to lead them. If they are interested, they will appreciate you doing that. That means you need to quit wasting time smalltalking her through text and get her to meet up with you or at least take a baby step to getting her to agree to facetiming. What would make you think, according to your description of your interactions, that she isn't doing anything more than being polite when she one word answers you? Does she reach out to you or is it you that initiates contact? I ask you all of these questions because I want you to think and be realistic about where you stand with this 1 girl. If you don't know where you actually stand at this moment with her then you can't get the right advice. The fact that you've never met her in person, she hasn't hinted around about meeting in person, and she one words you would make me believe that she is in no way interested in you. I don't know if it's true because you haven't described anything that would make anyone believe that there is potential interest and her being awkward is your excuse for not making things happen. Yep theres truth to what youre saying. Re awkward - Im referring to the social cues that any standard woman in society would respond to and Im just assuming that given she has lived most her life in the Amish community she may or may not respond to standard PUA game. Also maybe the portrayal I've given was worse than it actually is - It's weird because when I complimented her cake baking skills she sent me two heart emojis. I jokingly said she needs to bake me a cake and she said to find the book shes looking for. Shes complimented me on my knowledge of literature etc. She laughs during the voice recordings and there has been banter. Where were discussing literature and careers she interacts, there are laughs, she has asked me a few questions etc. Now when I say one worded responses she said she is busy at a family gathering. I think I have piqued her interest but need that to develop and I guess thats where im struggling. Social cues that standard women in society would respond to? If I told the standard girl that she needed to bake me a cake, even if it was a joke, and her response was "find the book I'm looking for", I'd say she was pretty good at social cues. Not only is she good at social cues, I'd say that she was an expert at at unoffensively rejecting me. OP, you are communicating with a girl that you've never met in person and you're doing just enough to keep her responding without taking any risk in order to avoid rejection (at least that is what I see so far). You saying that she is awkward puts the blame on her for not responding correctly. It's actually more likely that she knows exactly what you are trying to do and doing just enough to not hurt your feelings and at the same time avoiding giving you false hope. Again, I need to point out that I could be wrong but you haven't added anything that would make it seem that she is interested. At some point you need to put yourself in the position of being rejected. You've done the banter. You've done the compliments. You are at the point of saying that you have her interest piqued. Make something happen. Make her commit to a "yes" or a "no". "Yes, let's facetime." "Yes, let's meet up." "No, I'm not interested." |
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Post by lorenzolopez on Feb 20, 2021 20:53:01 GMT
Yep theres truth to what youre saying. Re awkward - Im referring to the social cues that any standard woman in society would respond to and Im just assuming that given she has lived most her life in the Amish community she may or may not respond to standard PUA game. Also maybe the portrayal I've given was worse than it actually is - It's weird because when I complimented her cake baking skills she sent me two heart emojis. I jokingly said she needs to bake me a cake and she said to find the book shes looking for. Shes complimented me on my knowledge of literature etc. She laughs during the voice recordings and there has been banter. Where were discussing literature and careers she interacts, there are laughs, she has asked me a few questions etc. Now when I say one worded responses she said she is busy at a family gathering. I think I have piqued her interest but need that to develop and I guess thats where im struggling. Social cues that standard women in society would respond to? If I told the standard girl that she needed to bake me a cake, even if it was a joke, and her response was "find the book I'm looking for", I'd say she was pretty good at social cues. Not only is she good at social cues, I'd say that she was an expert at at unoffensively rejecting me. OP, you are communicating with a girl that you've never met in person and you're doing just enough to keep her responding without taking any risk in order to avoid rejection (at least that is what I see so far). You saying that she is awkward puts the blame on her for not responding correctly. It's actually more likely that she knows exactly what you are trying to do and doing just enough to not hurt your feelings and at the same time avoiding giving you false hope. Again, I need to point out that I could be wrong but you haven't added anything that would make it seem that she is interested. At some point you need to put yourself in the position of being rejected. You've done the banter. You've done the compliments. You are at the point of saying that you have her interest piqued. Make something happen. Make her commit to a "yes" or a "no". "Yes, let's facetime." "Yes, let's meet up." "No, I'm not interested." good post. But suppose she isnt interested then why make her commit to something ? That's my question here - how do I increase interest levels so that when I do ask for commitment I'm more likely to receive a more positive response ? |
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Post by lorenzolopez on Feb 20, 2021 20:53:59 GMT
Social cues that standard women in society would respond to? If I told the standard girl that she needed to bake me a cake, even if it was a joke, and her response was "find the book I'm looking for", I'd say she was pretty good at social cues. Not only is she good at social cues, I'd say that she was an expert at at unoffensively rejecting me. OP, you are communicating with a girl that you've never met in person and you're doing just enough to keep her responding without taking any risk in order to avoid rejection (at least that is what I see so far). You saying that she is awkward puts the blame on her for not responding correctly. It's actually more likely that she knows exactly what you are trying to do and doing just enough to not hurt your feelings and at the same time avoiding giving you false hope. Again, I need to point out that I could be wrong but you haven't added anything that would make it seem that she is interested. At some point you need to put yourself in the position of being rejected. You've done the banter. You've done the compliments. You are at the point of saying that you have her interest piqued. Make something happen. Make her commit to a "yes" or a "no". "Yes, let's facetime." "Yes, let's meet up." "No, I'm not interested." good post. But suppose she isnt interested then why make her commit to something ? That's my question here - how do I increase interest levels so that when I do ask for commitment I'm more likely to receive a more positive response ?how do I develop that ? |
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Post by JackZero on Feb 20, 2021 22:07:33 GMT
good post. But suppose she isnt interested then why make her commit to something ? That's my question here - how do I increase interest levels so that when I do ask for commitment I'm more likely to receive a more positive response ?how do I develop that ? A lot of guys come here want advice on how to be attractive for 1 specific girl. That's not how pickup works. You're goal, in PUA, is to be as attractive to as many women as possible. When you approach her, you approach as an attractive man. When you get her contact info, you do it as an attractive man. When you ask her out, you do it as an attractive man. Everything that you've said, you were hoping that she found you attractive. You approached her with what you thought was attractive. You did your communications in a way that you thought was attractive. Your gut is telling you that she doesn't find you attractive. You are looking for that Hail Mary pass to change the outcome of the game that you've played so far. If she doesn't find you attractive right now and you never met her IRL then there is no magic trick that's going to change that. You are, at best, an acquaintance. At worst, you are a creepy guy that keeps contacting her because of a wrong number but doesn't get the hint. So, why make her commit to something? So you won't keep wasting time. You've already put in your groundwork and it's time to see if it's paid off. If she commits to some sort of activity with you then that is outstanding. If she denies you, then you get to delete her contact info and move onto girls that will find you attractive. |
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Post by lorenzolopez on Feb 21, 2021 1:53:59 GMT
A lot of guys come here want advice on how to be attractive for 1 specific girl. That's not how pickup works. You're goal, in PUA, is to be as attractive to as many women as possible. When you approach her, you approach as an attractive man. When you get her contact info, you do it as an attractive man. When you ask her out, you do it as an attractive man. Everything that you've said, you were hoping that she found you attractive. You approached her with what you thought was attractive. You did your communications in a way that you thought was attractive. Your gut is telling you that she doesn't find you attractive. You are looking for that Hail Mary pass to change the outcome of the game that you've played so far. If she doesn't find you attractive right now and you never met her IRL then there is no magic trick that's going to change that. You are, at best, an acquaintance. At worst, you are a creepy guy that keeps contacting her because of a wrong number but doesn't get the hint. So, why make her commit to something? So you won't keep wasting time. You've already put in your groundwork and it's time to see if it's paid off. If she commits to some sort of activity with you then that is outstanding. If she denies you, then you get to delete her contact info and move onto girls that will find you attractive. sound advice. Thanks, bro. |
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