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Post by bluecollar on Oct 3, 2022 20:14:14 GMT
I'm a frequent gym goer. I've actually meet a few close friends now, from the gym. I know its a great way to meet like minded people who might have the same ambitions as I do. I have found it difficult to meet women at the gym though. I have found it a little intimidating to say the least. most of the women are very attractive which takes alot of confidence to approach. I also think the atmosphere of the gym makes it difficult to meet women. I know theres ways that I could succeed but I haven't yet. If anyone has any advice for me, I am all ears
details I go to planet fitness gyms Ive been a regular at the gym for years I am confident in the gym atmosphere but not confident enough to do any approaches
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Post by JackZero on Oct 3, 2022 20:52:43 GMT
In the PUA lingo, there are things called warm approaches and cold approaches. I would label approaching a woman at a gym as a frostbite approach. Although it is in a social setting, it's not a place that is designed to be social. Most women in the gym take precautions so that they won't be approached, i.e. avoiding eye contact, headphones in ears, having their backs turned towards everyone. A majority of the time, most women want to work out and leave. So that's an additional time constraint put on you.
Can you approach? Yes. Should you approach? Maybe. If she's showing you interest, take advantage and approach. If she's not showing interest, don't approach until you can get her to show interest. A simple head nod acknowledging her on one workout session. Work it up to a greeting on the next and possibly getting a name. The next you see her and she's on something like the leg press say something like "uh-oh...leg day" and keep going about your business without making it weird. At this point, there should be enough rapport to where you can approach her and not be perceived as the creepy guy.
I have approached at the gym and have had some successes but it's not worth it most of the time just because it's not optimal.
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Post by TheWhiteTiger on Oct 3, 2022 23:54:38 GMT
Sounds like JZ above me has more experience, so I'd say his advice is sound.
I think one scenario where you have *a bit* more time is if a woman is using a machine and you are waiting for it (or vice versa). You might be able to strike a conversation BETWEEN sets
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Post by bluecollar on Oct 4, 2022 0:50:41 GMT
When I was in high school and had unlimited social encounters I remember working out really hard and not wanting to talk to someone while I worked out. Since I've got out of high school am I sociability at work has dramatically decreased I found myself using the gym as a social place. Believe it or not I think I would've had more opportunity to meet Women at the gym when I was known for being a very hard worker in the gym. I think it shows that you have your Mind on track and not just there to talk.
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Post by TheWhiteTiger on Oct 5, 2022 18:51:43 GMT
I followed up on this and tried to open a girl at the gym myself. She was using the leg extension machine and I wanted to use next. Tried to talk to her between sets but her English was not good and she was very shy about it... I need to consider what to do in those cases
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Post by jacob bailer on Dec 8, 2023 2:23:24 GMT
i feel like a gym is better than a bar. with the gym, you can see the female multiple times, and say hi a few times, then eventually lead into a conversation. with a bar, you will probably see her only once, and if you blow it, thats it. females are also less defensive with dudes theyve seen multiple times. this is why females are more likely to let their guard down with a mailman than a pua. females at bars, although in a social setting, tend to be more shallow. most of the females i see in the night life circles seem to be only interested in talking with the other females they came with. even when im asking for directions, females seem more receptive. and i actually got a few instagrams like that. i didnt even ask them. if you start talking and they fck with you, then theyll ask you for your socials. for a while, thats what i was doing. just talking and if they liked what they heard then they can ask me for my socials. aint no sense in me asking them if they gonna ignore my messages anyway. but really i think guys focus too much on approaching women, and moving in with scripts. the most important thing i find is how you respond, and how comfortable you are with responding. not to say im an expert. im not, but i can tell you from my mistakes. if i ask a female for directions on a college campus, and she asks me if im a student, then she talks about how she is a phd student. it's really all about how i respond, and react with that. my natural response is just to say nothing, so in all honesty, instead of doing cold approaches, if i just responded properly to the phd student, then i wouldnt even have to do cold approaches, because by talking about herself, and asking me questions, she's already shown interest, which is way more useful than some random female walking to work who has shown no interest at all. in all honesty i screwed up with that interaction. i was in a hurry to go to an orientation event which was wack, and i really didnt take the time to respond to her saying what i was doing at the college
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Post by Alex Penn on Dec 8, 2023 14:56:25 GMT
Hitting on women at the gym can be a tricky game, I get it. The trick is to play it smooth without being too forward.
Here's a simple plan for you:
Casual Bump-Ins: Start small. Make casual comments. If you're at the water cooler, ask about her routine. Keep it light, no pressure.
Spotting Help: Offer a hand if you see someone struggling with weights. It's a classic move, breaks the ice without being too direct.
Post-Workout Fuel: Hit the smoothie bar after a workout. See her there? Strike up a convo about favorite post-gym snacks. Easy, right?
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maestro
MPUA Forum Addict
Posts: 187
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Post by maestro on Dec 9, 2023 15:03:56 GMT
I think the best thing to do is have openers that aren't only used in clubs, for example I like "Looks like the party's over here!" but this only works in clubs and bars, create some openers which could be used in "day game" which will also work at the gym, if you check out the stylelife chllenge there's a whole day where you create openers to use and these could also be used in the gym as long as you create ones that could only be used in bars and clubs. Try it out!
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Post by Alex Penn on Dec 10, 2023 0:33:25 GMT
Absolutely, mate! Openers that fit different settings give you versatility. For day game or places like the gym, it's about being contextually relevant and genuine.
Try something like, "Hey, that workout looks killer! Mind if I steal a tip or two?
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