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Post by N2thevoid on Apr 16, 2018 18:41:49 GMT
Like 60 you says, "Risk creepy". Don't be afraid to push things, though incrementally or u'll seem psycho.
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tinman
MPUA Forum Enthusiast
Posts: 86
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Post by tinman on Apr 16, 2018 18:49:09 GMT
Yeah, I definitely risked creepy a few times the other night, lol. I made a point to experiment with 'direct game' (even though most stuff I read heavily advise against it in lieu of very good looks) So you open them and tell them that you noticed them and think they are hot. What are the WORDS that I am supposed to say after this (the transition?) Like, Jack said I failed to carry on displaying the value that I showed with the direct open. But I assume i'm not supposed to just carry on telling her how hot she is!!? (Or am I??) Anyone have any good examples?
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Post by JackZero on Apr 16, 2018 19:18:45 GMT
It's how you sprinkle that she's hot into the conversation more than it's scripted. Learn to listen what a woman gives you so you can use it to your advantage. One of the most common things that I say to a woman is, "you're cute so you can get away with that," and that's because I get women to talk about themselves. I ask the dreaded "interview questions" because it allows me to dig deeper into what they like and don't like. They talk about work, friends, school and each of those things gives me the opportunity to say things that revolve around a woman.
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tinman
MPUA Forum Enthusiast
Posts: 86
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Post by tinman on Apr 17, 2018 11:32:16 GMT
just being honest "I thought you were cute and wouldn't be able to forgive myself if I left w/o saying hi" is a better approach. It's open and honest and she knows you're attracted to her so why bring up some indirect thing. I guess the idea is that it might buy me more time whereby I can demonstrate humour and other 'attributes' that are said to build attraction. If I go up too a girl and tell her she's hot, and she looks at me and thinks i'm ugly, then surely there's like a near 100% chance that she'll just basically shoot me down straight away. I guess there's 2 camps, and one of them believes that 'game' is basically just stating your intent (which is as least super easy and anyone can do it which I like!! but the other camp believes it's about skill in being able to give yourself the best chance at building attraction and consider direct game 'fools mate' and not even 'game' at all. I'm yet to decide where I stand although I certainly think that direct makes better sense if you are blessed in the looks department At least that's more or less how someone described it to me on a different pua site the other day
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Post by N2thevoid on Apr 17, 2018 15:27:03 GMT
just being honest "I thought you were cute and wouldn't be able to forgive myself if I left w/o saying hi" is a better approach. It's open and honest and she knows you're attracted to her so why bring up some indirect thing. I guess the idea is that it might buy me more time whereby I can demonstrate humour and other 'attributes' that are said to build attraction. If I go up too a girl and tell her she's hot, and she looks at me and thinks i'm ugly, then surely there's like a near 100% chance that she'll just basically shoot me down straight away. How do you know what she’s thinking? Are you a mind reader? Will idea is to always assume attraction Unless of course she walks away or reaches into her purse to pull out pepper spray.I guess there's 2 camps, and one of them believes that 'game' is basically just stating your intent (which is as least super easy and anyone can do it which I like!! but the other camp believes it's about skill in being able to give yourself the best chance at building attraction and consider direct game 'fools mate' and not even 'game' at all.
It’s a bit of both to be honest. Calibrating to your target is one thing but placating, kissing ass, doing things to win her over, and basically sending the message you don’t respect yourself, won’t win you any favors.I'm yet to decide where I stand although I certainly think that direct makes better sense if you are blessed in the looks department At least that's more or less how someone described it to me on a different pua site the other day You over state the importance of looks and don’t quite grasp female attraction which is much more nuanced and complex then male attraction
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Post by curtis72 on Apr 17, 2018 20:50:33 GMT
I'd say the direct/compliment approach only really for good-looking guys. If women don't find you attractive immediately, sometimes they can be put off by you expressing attraction.
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Post by JackZero on Apr 17, 2018 21:18:54 GMT
I'd say the direct/compliment approach only really for good-looking guys. If women don't find you attractive immediately, sometimes they can be put off by you expressing attraction. This is somewhat true, but women are way more forgiving than men when it comes to physical attraction. I've always been of the opinion that if you approach a woman in a way that she finds acceptable, which can vary from woman to woman, she will look for something to be attracted to in a man. If he approaches her with: Not good looking guy: This may be awkward but you were so cute that I just wanted to say hello. Then he can't follow up with anything, then she's not going to have a reason to continue or look for that attractive quality. The not so good looking guy benefits by letting attraction be known because it normalizes her mindset as to why he's there talking to her. If he does not let the conversation drift too far from the reason that he's there and can keep her engaged then she will move towards being attracted to him. What the majority of guys that can't depend on their looks do is try to talk to the woman as long as he can but won't express attraction because of the fear of scaring her off and that normalizes the friendship vibe.
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Post by jesterofmalice on Apr 17, 2018 22:36:15 GMT
If he does not let the conversation drift too far from the reason that he's there and can keep her engaged then she will move towards being attracted to him. How best to do this out of interest? Admittedly I don't tend to do direct game (I tend to think it's only for good looking guys in my experience, although I do experiment with it still as can even be seen in my latest FR) but i'm curious none-the-less I watch infields of people going direct; they usually all open in the way you guys suggest (''I know this is awkward but I thought you looked nice and wanted to say hello'') and then they typically either just start asking them what they are up too, what they do for work etc, or they stack it with a 'cold read' like ''You look like you're into fashion'' or they tell them what they noticed about her (''I noticed you were walking super fast'' or whatever) Are any of them examples close to what you mean when you speak about keeping the topic close to the reason that you are there talking to her? Maybe you could provide an example out of curiosity
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Post by JackZero on Apr 17, 2018 23:58:04 GMT
Here's an example and we'll assume that the example of the opening is the awkward opener
Her: Hi Him: Is this weird or do guys stop you all of the time?
Her answer at this point doesn't matter
Her: Sometimes Him: I'm not surprised because I don't usually do this but I couldn't resist
or
Her: Hardly ever Him: It's probably because guys are intimidated by beautiful women
Then take the conversation somewhere and keep playing with it. I personally wouldn't go with "you look like you're into fashion, but I would ask them what they're up too and dig into that a few levels.
Him: What are you up to? Her: I'm on my lunch break. Him: Oh yeah, where do you work Her: At the office down the street Him: Do you like it there?
This is an emotional question and it is gold when it comes to getting women to talk about themselves and it opens up the conversation at a personal level. It allows you to tease, compliment, approve, and relate.
A good trick to flirtatious smalltalk is to throw in compliments and teases. If she says something intelligent, give her a compliment by saying that she's more than just a pretty face. If she says something smart-assed tell her that you're going to let her get away with it because she's cute.
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Post by downtownace on Jul 24, 2018 18:46:49 GMT
There is a lot on the subject of opening but much on transitioning. Does anyone have links or advice on how to best transition? Examples would be great.
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Post by Alex Penn on Dec 6, 2023 14:12:12 GMT
Cut the fluff, man. Keep it simple. 'Hey, I noticed you and wanted to meet you.' No need for fancy lines. Confidence over complexity. Feel the vibe, be genuine.
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